Archive for March, 2009

In a Big Distress

Tuesday, March 24th, 2009

I feel in a huge distress these days. My heart tears on a thousand of pieces.I have clashes and quarrels at school. Today I almost cracked out during oneof the IBP meetings. The devil tries to oppress me hardly. I broke the Lenta bit because I bought a coffee from a vending machine at school and I realizedit contains milk right after I have paid for it since I have paid I couldn’t just leave it.On Sunday there was a liturgy in the Russian Orthodox Church here in Anrnhem.The previous two nights aunt Zlatina and her husband slept at my place.I guess these had a good influence on me, however it was pretty uglythat they smoked so much in my room. I couldn’t stand the smoke anymore.I’m broken hearted as I said already. I have some confort in readingmy Orthodox Bible. Although it is a Lent time the priests in the Orthodox churchdid drinked that really distracted me since they insist on keeping the fast and thesaviour Jesus has prescribed us to fast. If I break the fast well that’s okay but theyare supposed to keep it since they are into priesthood. However I did sinned withthinking this bad thoughts in my heart I don’t have the right to judge them.Today I had SHR Meeting. Things are sleeping out of my mind. To be honest I feellike a completely dying man… Oh Lord please help me, sustain me in my infirmity andmadness. Don’t leave me fail and become a laughingstock for the ungodly. My mindis pretty much distracted this days as well. I don’t have a desire for anything …Day after day just existing. To be honest I experience bad feelings and the more I lookin myself I see wrongness and sinfulness and evil. I just pray that the Lord have mercyon my and grant me to pass my stuff this semester. I had a bit of work with launchinga new site design for one of the hosted websites and had some unclearances before allgot resolved. My discography of Larry Norman which I’m downloading is on it’s way to me.And I’ll have it in a couple of hours, at least that’s nice. I asked the Lord for forgivenessand experienced a bit of relief as well as when I was reading the bible I felt okay..The teachears are preaching a psychologic method called Transactional Analysis, which is I thinkpretty much demonic, they use it heavily, more about that could be seen on wikipedia TA END—–

my Wednesday

Thursday, March 19th, 2009

The day was intensive as usual. We had OPL which as usual was a shit and afterwards we hadOPL. Toine and Joop attempted to gave us again a hard time and bullied us hard aboutour Project Plan we’re trying to develop for SHR. Then in the evening I went to Russian Churchby walking to exercise my muscles a bit and save an 1.10 EUR (the bus ticket price).We had a nice singing session, it’s so nice that the Lord allows me to sing for him.Zlati has just phoned me and he proposed to be my guest so he is probably nowtravelling by train to Arnhem. Yes something more I yesterday met a nice guy that I’m alreadymeeting on a couple of times, he usually feeds the swans and ducks in the Presikhaf park(that is the small park near school. I had some work to do when I came back home after therehearsals with the Choir. Then I prayed a bit raid some of “the law” in the old testament and went to bed.END—–

World Fastest Md5 cracker

Saturday, March 14th, 2009

A friend of mine (SIC-a) referred me to a great article on the topic of password cracking.It seems some guy out there has created a md5 password cracker which is claimed to be the world’slargest password cracker. The article could be seen here Enjoy!The idea behind the cracker is that it takes advantage of the Video card (GPU) or in other words the video CPU.It’s reported to work with NVidia 8xxx++ and a couple of others :)END—–

A trip to Nijmegen & Suffering in Christ

Saturday, March 14th, 2009

This terrible constant pain feeling that’s inside is there to stay.I do keep my attempts to isolate what is the cause of it.I have a couple of theories. That it might be related to thewater in the dormitory here or the place itself.Like we know from the bible that there are cursed places,like Sodom was before God destroyed it, however we knowalso that Lot was rightous and God spared him. I alsorecently have red while I was doing my usual bible readingsbefore sleep time that our Lord Jesus commanded the Holy Apostlesto say “Peace be to this house” regarding every house they usedto enter. The Lord said if the house is worthy let apostles peace bethere. I just experimented with this I said in the house “Peace beto that house” with the hope that this place God might considerworthy. However I have so much internal struggles apart from thepain I’m constantly facing temptations from the enemy of accusationsof other people and claims that they do stuff wrong, satan istrying to influence me really badly. Yesterday I was on a vergeto a burn out. This week I had plenty of work to do. I tried my best.Many things happened this week.First on Tuesday under my influence and the decision of our projectmanager to quit, we experienced her statement that she is out ofthe project. We had to select a new PM, after some voting there weretwo options between two girls eventually we ended up with Ina beingour new PM (I wasn’t completely convinced that this is the correctthing to do, because of her dominant character, however at the endI accepted the fact. And tried a couple of maneuvers with the clear aimto clear up all sort of offenses that I raised again anybody in the groupand the same time to try to decrease the gap that’s being formedbetween me and some other “key” group members. The change of the PMhad been a wise choise since the old PM Bianca (great girl btw!, really impressive) but the problem was she tried to manage the group in too “open” way.And the students weren’t of course on the level to handle that, thereforeshe couldn’t make it. Well I suspect her exit of the project was quite plannedand there is some good reason between it as well as a benefit for everybody(guess that was a strategic move). The teachers are quite a lot playing with us,literally, manipulating the situation as always, I really hate that Oh Lord I just hope that the Lord God would deliver me from this evil thinkers. Well all this teachers I could see they think that business could be profitable only if you act manipulatively on ppl, hide your cards always plan and trigger events on your behalf. Well I personally believe this is quite a lot satanic, so I decide to follow God and not to follow this behaviour. Or better to say take only parts of it like triggering, but the way for triggering to be honesty and openness instead of the opposite way. Anyways this post is getting too long so I’ll try to hasten it a bit. Yesterday we went with Zlati to Nijmegen as he said he is coming here on Tuesday. He slept at my place, he went out with some Asian guys, I had to went home to fix some stuff a qmail installation on one of the new servers that I had to configure for Winner Ltd. Happily with God’s help I managed to complete the task after a lot of tampering in the qmail components. The day after we went with Zlati to Nijmegen, I had to note the two way ticket was quite cheap (only 4.50 EUR). There weren’t much to be seen in Nijmegen, the only nice thing we saw there was actually a couple of buildings as well as a probably traditional wedding in the Netherlands.It was funny really the guests were taking pictures with the bridegrooms infront of a Church, and they were on their way to lock the Chuch right afterwards the marriage .. Oh Lord, that was so bad to see we have gone so miserable and unbelieving the wedding within a Church has become the next tradition we ppl have to follow, not seen really as a union in front of God and trhough God but just as something to make to tickle our selfishness …Anyways we were having a walk around Nijmegen when my father’s cousin ringed and told me they are infront of the dormitory in Arnhem. Well I had to ask her to wait for an hour because I was on the neighbor city Nijmegen, but there was no way I expected them to come later on at the evening. So hurried up a bit with our walk around the city and it’s shops. We got a free coffee in some pc selling shop through a coffee machine provided by AMD! So cool, great marketing. This machine pretty much did played a role in convincing me to buy AMD if I have to buy a new CPU in the future. We also take a look at a special alcohol grocery store,I haven’t seen so much alcohol brands in my life, that reminded me pretty much to the winery we visited a couple of weeks before in Amsterdam. I was thinking, people doesn’t need so much choice it’s too much … Well what I liked about communism was that at least the choice was in a limits so you could possibly be aware of most of the brands and be easy with them, instead of having so much choice that you absolutely lost in what to choose. We entered a couple of game selling specific shops ! Nice I would like to see more of this in the future, well you know I used to be a gamer in my past I guess this had left some trace of itself in me. Then we catched the train back for Arnhem it was only a 20 minutes travel. We were in Anrhem took the bus “connexion” and went back to the dorm. My relatives “cousin Zlatina and uncle Ivailo” came along and stayed at my room for the night, I loose myself a bit because I had probably a demonic attack and on top of that I’ve received an email from one of my bosses asking about some data about dbg dnses’s ips. I encountered the fact he needs our dnses so therefore I replied him back with an email pointing to the dbg dns tutorial. He got mad and replied back with an email attempting to accuse me that it’s my fault and I don’t read my mails because he wanted the “IP addresses”. Then I got a bit irritated and at the same time felt bad and firstly I thought that he might be right, but then after rethinking it I realized that I did the right think because he asked for DNS-es and actually it’s not possible by RFC standards to put an IP for a DNS. Thus I bringed him back an email explaining all this and asked him for some more clarification on the matter in order to know shall I do a records in the dbg dnses or not, since then I never have received an email from, well thanks God. What really pissed me of on top of that was a demonic forces which tried to attack me, a spiritual sadness plus some desperation and irritation from the fact that my partens had sent me food which will sufficient for at least 3 months without me buying anythink else than bread, they sent 6 box full of provisions, one of them was fully full with Bulgarian tins containing meet and on top of the box was ones containing pork meet. Heavens you could imagine how irritated and hurt I was by all this considering the fact that I said to my parents numerous times: ” Do not send me tins, I’m fed up with tins cause I eat tin food here, most of the time”, anyways they haven’t really listened to me … as usual so I got pissed up and flared up(exploded). So I acted pretty stupid in front of my cousin, then I had to give them two my apologies for the stupidities I’ve said or done, but still I firstly begged them to pick up all the tins containing meet, happily we ended to a consent that they’ll pick up the port tins and I’ll eat the rest of the tin after the Lent is over. However I felt pretty much bad of the fact that i had to have a cardboard box full of meet containg tins through the whole Lent period. I have to note that I did broke the Lent already a lot of times because I had some cappuchino left for drinking from before and yesterday also I ate a lot of Bulgarian cheese together with my relatives, we also did had a nice chat and drinked two small cups of the traditional drink “Rakia” i was really refreshing really! Just to clarify things up a bit I usually hate “Rakia”, this time it was great 🙂 Then some few hours later we went to bed I slept on a place where Plamen slept next to the heater laying on a couple of pillows of a sofa jointed together. I slept quite okay although only for a couple of hours. I couldn’t sleep more cause of Ivailo’s voicy snoring. Today early in the morning we drinked coffee together had another chat, they encouraged me to be more brave and not to spirit lifted and I sent them to continue with their travel to Belgium where they have to look and buy some of the firnuture they sell in their tiny futniture shop in Dobrich. Wow I know that post became huge … Thanks and Glory to God for keeping me still running on! Glory Oh Lord! Recently I use to listen to a lot of Larry Norman related music in, I feel it like quite beneficial for putting me out of this terrible bitterness feeling that keeps to rule me on. Glory God!END—–

A funny caricature representing our human ways

Thursday, March 12th, 2009

A friend of mine (Necrolea) had just sent me a funny drawingrepresenting our human major tendencies in life. here Here it is END—–

Gnome System profiler and Benchmark

Tuesday, March 10th, 2009

Since I’m running Debian Lenny for some time and I’m a gnome user, I recently wasplaying with gnome trying to figure out the new things in it and I stucked onGnome System profiler and Benchmark. I remember this little handy app wasin previous gnomes as well, however this version is quite sophisticated.I used i tto generate a profile for my Thinkpad 8943 DTG Notebook. Here is the itself END—–

Amsterdam Pictures & My weekend

Monday, March 9th, 2009

I had that sadness,desperation feeling again. I’m starting to feel that this is somehow relatedto my stay in the dormitory. I guess the devil is trying to bring me down, however I’m surethe Lord Jesus my saviour would beat him up really bad :D.Here is a link to the pictures we have token with Zlati in Amsterdam Amsterdam pics .Let me review in few words my weekend. On laundry done my laundry strethed out my clothes etc. Went to bed quite late.Saturday I woke up, can’t precisely remember what I did then. I remember I had that sorrow in me. Oh Lord, Oh Lord help pls.ON saturday I went to Sali’s place to teach him and his wife a bit of simple Windows basic things, then we went out and wentto Lumiere the restaurant where Ina and Javor are working right now. We was on a way to have an argue withTazira (the wife of the owner of the restaurant), because I mentioned that Jesus is the Son of God. And sheoutlined that that’s not true, however for good or bad the argue didn’t progressed. Sali introduced me thereto a Pakistan guy, nice guy btw. He decided to pay our drinks which was pretty kind of him. We had a small walkaround the city center around midnight and then we took the bikes from the bike parking and heded back to home.On Sunday I slept until 11:43 I believe, then I gathered my clothes from the drying ropes. Then sit on my notebookand did something, I cannot recall right now. Anyways then I had to right my “Commission” part for the SHR Project.Sali ring in skype and offered me to show me a nice big park they have here in Arnhem, I acccepted and headedto his place. Drago and Pavel were there we drinked coffee together another boy I know rom the college Didocame there. Sali and her wife treated us with some candies and chocolate bars. Then we went to that park the as we hadprevfiously agreed. The park is called Sonsbeek. It was quite relaxing to be there thanks God. Now I’m homereviewing and fixing parts of what we have written previously for the IMM project. END—–

Two partly fulfilled interesting Orthodox prophecies concerning the end of the world

Saturday, March 7th, 2009

Recently I googled a bit about something and by accident (no accidents really exist) :)I stumbled upon two interesting prophecies One of Saint Kosmas from Aitolia and theother was St. Nile’s. You could check them out in youtube.Or simply follow check them here:
1. Saint Nile’s prophecy
Saint Kosmas prophecy Glory be to the Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit! Now and forever and ever! Amen!END—–


Thursday, March 5th, 2009

A friend of mine has just recommended pretty handy solution.If you move a lot around computers running Windows and you need to be have permanently your Thunderbird, FTP, OpenOffice, Gimp,Firefox and many more with you.Check it out on the following address END—–

12 Must Have Openoffice extensions

Tuesday, March 3rd, 2009

Today I was googling around about tutorial to learn how to make diagrams via openoffice draw and I stumbledupon the following nice tutorial check it out here END—–